Answers to made up questions
What is a normal bun?
A normal bun is a classic burger bun, typically soft and simple, unlike brioche buns which make the burger taste like crap.
We get it, you're trying to justify the ridiculous pricing in your hipster burger BAR (Let's be honest if it's not served on a plate it's not even a resturant so you have no right calling yourself that). But having brioche buns as the default offering, leading innocent civilians to accidentally order and face the dissapointment of a premature dessert surrounding your dry and tasteless beef patties should be a specific chargable offense. It needs to stop.
It's a whole new level of food fraud when it comes to chicken burgers. The meat is already sweet, and the sauce is too. Do you not try your menu items? Maybe try cutting sugar out of your diet for a few weeks, and then try it. At a very minimum you might live longer and learn to appreciate savoury food items, and perhaps realise there are no valid, positive opinions of brioche buns in the context of burgers or even food.
Why advocate for normal buns?
In a world full of important causes, someone has to stand up against the tyrany of beef wrapped in cake. You know in France they put cream and jam inside brioche buns right? Because brioche is a dessert!
For those who might argue sweet and savoury things work well together, like a pancake with crispy, streaky 'bacon', please accept your views are simply wrong and go back to your swamp.
How can I support this campaign?
You can support by sharing our message, sow disinformation online about big brioche and encourage local 'restaurants' (see above) to offer normal buns by politely asking waitstaff for an edible alternative to brioche.
What type of art will be featured?
We aim to promote our platform by carefully curating a collection of parody art, through which we aim to promote our important message (and any other messages we deem of similar importance, like a campaign to introuduce life sentencing for those who hog the middle lane on the M1).
Can I contribute art?
Absolutely! We welcome submissions that align with our campaign which we will monetise on merchandise without credit or reward!
Where can I find updates?
Updates will be posted on our website and not on social media. Who still uses facebook anyways? 2012 was 13 years ago ffs. I'm far to shy for TikTok or for a full blown reddit post, so maybe I'll lurk in the reddit comments idk.
Who is behind this?
nobody! Well obviously not nobody but mind your own business. Why are you asking? It's an online campaign website. Use your imagination. go away. My name is Hugh Janus and I live on 43 Wallaby Way, Sydney. now leave me alone.
This website is satire. If you don't understand what that means, please get in touch as I know of a Nigerian Prince who urgently needs your help with a financial matter.
Embrace Normal Buns
Join us in advocating for the classic burger experience with normal buns, celebrating simplicity and flavor instead of overly sweet buns that are gross and should be banned.
Our Mission
Big Brioche may have gained a foothold in hipster burger bars, if we don't fight back they'll start polluting the last bastion of freedom; the humble roadside buger van. No More!
Even the AI is so distraught at the idea, it's created a picture of a burger van with two towballs, so multiple cars can hitch to it at the same time. A bit like my ex-girlfriend when I was away from home.
Do you see that burger above? Perfection (although it's AI generated and I specifically asked for seeds on top). Also - I think it's got yellow peppers in it. Not sure what that's about because it would taste terrible (too watery, kinda like when they put too many tomato slices in) but I don't want to replace the picture.... because the environmental damage I'm causing by repeatedly clicking 'use AI to generate image' would even make an oil executive blush. There's a polar bear out there floating on a shrinking piece of ice, adrift all because you're reading this. Like the 'resturants' using brioche buns, omg STOP.